I'm a Goan woman, working in Mumbai as the founder of a studio called Totem Creative. I try to make the world happier, safer and more meaningful. I believe education, knowledge and awareness, art, writing and creating Social Impact are my means to achieve that end.

Friday, June 22, 2007

(J) Johnny to IIM

A first-grade teacher, Ms Neelam (Age 28) was having trouble with one of
her students.
The teacher asked, "Johnny, what is your problem?"

Johnny answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the
third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the
third-grade too!"

Ms Neelam had enough. She took Johnny to the principal's office. While Johnny
waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what
the situation was.

The principal told Ms Neelam he would give the Johnny a test and if he failed
to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and
behave. She agreed. Johnny was brought in and the conditions were explained
to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"

Johnny: "9".

Principal! : "What is 6 x 6?"

Johnny: "36".

And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade
should know. The principal looks at Ms Neelam and tells her, "I think Johnny
can go to the third-grade. "

Ms Neelam says to the principal, "I have some of my own questions. Can I
ask him?"

The principal and Johnny, both agree.

Ms Neelam asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?

Johnny: after a moment "Legs."

Ms Neelam:

"What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"

Johnny: "Pockets."

Ms Neelam: What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval,
delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?

Johnny: Coconut

Ms Neelam: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?

The principals eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer,
Johnny was taking charge.

Johnny: Bubblegum

Ms Neelam: What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a
dog does on three legs?
The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the

Johnny: Shake hands

Ms Neelam: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay?

Johnny: Yep.

Ms Neelam: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I
get wet before you do.

Johnny: Tent

Ms Neelam: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The
best man always has me first.

The Principal was looking restless, a bit tense and took one large Patiala
Vodka peg.

Johnny: Wedding Ring

Ms Neelam: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow
me, you feel good.

Johnny: Nose

Ms Neelam: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.

Johnny: Arrow

Ms Neelam: What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means lot of
heat and excitement?

Johnny: Firetruck

Ms Neelam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' & if u don't get it
u have to use your hand.

Johnny: Fork

Ms Neelam: What is it that all men have one of it's longer on some men
than on others, the pope doesn't use his and a man gives it to his wife
after they're married?


Ms Neelam: What part of the man has no bone but has muscles, has lots of
veins, like pumping, & is responsible for making love?

Johnny: HEART.

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the teacher,

"Send this Johnny to IIM Ahmedabad, I got the last ten questions wrong

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